Random info:

Also, just in case you were curious. If you happen to be traveling to Dhaka and forget your toiletries and you just happen to prefer Crest toothpaste to the local stuff... It will cost you about $7 to buy a toothbrush, Crest toothpaste from Germany, and a stick of deodorant. Just for the record, in true German fashion, I am really impressed with that toothpaste. My mouth feels so fresh and clean after using it!

Motivation

I have a confession to make. I struggle to get motivated to do certain things quite frequently. I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one but this is my confession and I can't speak for everyone. If you hadn't guessed by now, this is on my mind because I've been doing a lot of tasks lately that I'm just not all that motivated to do. Currently that task is editing a 36 page project proposal. As my mother and father well know, give me a pitchfork or a fence post driver and I could be outside working all day long but hit me with paperwork and my joy dwindles rather rapidly. I look for any small task I can possibly come up with to distract me from the paperwork for a short time and then try to work on it in bursts. I should probably police myself more carefully.

I have noticed a few additional habits I have when I'm avoiding work that I'm not motivated to do. I find myself more inclined to play games like hearts on the computer (I love playing hearts but must admit that it makes me feel like yelling at the computer when I lose). I also have a habit of playing around with numbers. This morning I read the HMMC church bulletin like I always do but decided to calculate what the average salary of an attendee should be based off attendance and an assumption that offering is a 10% tithe. I didn't do that to announce numbers or try to shame anyone; I was just curious what number I would come up with.

Oddly enough, the same thing that makes me interested in doing random math can lead people to have the wrong impression of me. I have had a coworker who wasn't around me too often think that I was a very organized and detail oriented person. I love knowing all the details, I dislike managing them. The fact that I know them and am interested in the details themselves because they help me to understand the bigger picture doesn't translate into me wanting to work with them beyond just toying with them. Fortunately, I was raised to understand that sometimes you've got to do things you just don't like doing. That doesn't mean it is easy, but somehow I'll find the motivation to tackle this monster, somewhere...somehow...

Being Busy

I really really like being busy sometimes. This past weekend a friend of Jon and Lindsay who has been in Bangladesh studying Bangla for the last several months took me up on an offer to come visit Bogra. She had been stuck in Dhaka the entire time she stayed here and this was an excuse to see some other parts of Bangladesh. I spent the weekend taking her around the area and just hanging out. Since it was entirely inappropriate for her to stay with me, I made arrangements for her to stay with some Brazilian friends of mine. I ended up having them and Nate over for 2 meals which I prepared. It was generally a great time but I started off the weekend with only 3 hours of sleep since I got in the mood to do housework the night before said friend arrived. I then spent the weekend going strong from roughly 6am to 12pm each day. I shouldn't complain though as what I did during those days was pleasant. I took her out for a couple of motorcycle rides around the countryside and we went on a walk through a few villages only to get ourselves invited into a home. They fed us snacks and she lied to them by telling them I was her older brother which was a good idea since we were out in the middle of nowhere which in general means it would be more scandalous for us to be walking together if we weren't married. In addition to that, when the neighbor lady had her arm and was dragging her towards the next house I could legitimately say that we were going to get us out of the situation (as the older brother she has to listen to me!). ;-) I do feel a bit bad about insulting that little old lady though by not going to her house. I knew if we did though that we were going to get pulled along to every house and I certainly didn't want to do that.

We also spent a fair amount of time hanging out with the Brazilians/Nate. I just like being busy sometimes even if I was mind numbingly tired by 10pm last night. I slept great and long. Now I just need to figure out how I'm going to watch the Butler game in a couple of days...

Luster

Yet another week has passed and I'm remembering something. Details are fine in spurts for me but lose their luster over time. Therefore, I'm starting to notice that cleaning my house is becoming more difficult to convince myself to do. The fun part now is figuring out how to convince myself otherwise. One mistake I made this weekend was taking my computer home. I spent my entire Saturday watching movies when I should have been doing some cleaning. I am way too easily distracted. If I don't have a computer at home I still often get distracted by reading a book but that is a bit more productive than watching a movie in my opinion.

I'm also starting to wonder if I'm not starting to get near my burnout point again. I've noticed myself getting more pessimistic about certain things lately and I just realized I've been 3 straight months in Bangladesh. Usually the 4th or 5th month is when I really start to notice it. It makes me wonder how much we control these feelings and how much they control us. I mean, I'm normally a go with the flow kind of guy but I always find myself getting worn down after so many months in this country. If I had a lot of control over that, you would think I could just apply a positive attitude and do better for longer. By all means, things have gone really well in my life lately but that doesn't seem to be stopping this, if this is indeed the start of burnout. If I do accept that it is somewhat beyond my control; how does one come to grips with that? How do I deal with the fact that I know I'm going to slowly get more grumpy over the next two months until I leave for America? Right now I'm not doing so bad at all, I just suspect this is coming. Then again, maybe this is just another situation in which details lose their luster for me. Maybe the solution for my house cleaning is the same solution I need to figure out for my life in general. I'll try to let you know if I figure anything interesting out.

A Girlfriend?

Some of you may be aware of recent events in my life and others may not be so I figure I'll tell this story once and get it all out of the way.

I now have a girlfriend. She is real and not a cat as my brother has suggested. Her name is Esther Clarke and she's a teacher at Grace International School in Dhaka. She is Irish with a lovely accent and a beautiful smile. We originally met at a party some friends were having and I assisted her to win a game of Settlers (meaning I lost badly). That didn't lead to anything other than an invite to the next party with that group of mutual friends which happened to be her birthday party. We didn't really talk much their either but I brought some cookies and cake that I had baked which led to us talking on facebook.

She seemed pretty cool on facebook so I asked if she wanted to get coffee the next time I was in Dhaka for a weekend. She obviously said yes. We met for what I thought would be 1-2 hours and a cup of coffee on a Saturday afternoon before I headed back to Bogra. It was 4.5 hours later when either of us bothered looking at a clock. She was late to make dinner for some friends and I was late to catch a bus to Bogra. I think both of us were pleasantly caught off guard.

Things have progressed from there smoothly even though I'm still not sure what she sees in me. ;-) As far as what I see in her...well I guess that is for another post but I will say one thing to calm any fears my family might have, she can take being the butt of a joke and that is really all it takes to fit in with us right? I look forward to seeing where God might lead Esther and I.

Almost forgot...

I almost completely forgot to post this week!

I moved this past week. I now live in town in Jodi's old flat. It is about a 5 minute walk from the office. It is a two bedroom apartment. Unfortunately, it was filthy dirty when I moved in on Thursday so I spent my weekend cleaning it from top to bottom. I've never loved cleaning but I think I realized something this past weekend; I don't hate cleaning like I thought I did. I think I just dislike being told to do it. I treated it like a strategy game and it isn't so bad. I first concentrated on one room which became my "clean room" which nothing could go in unless it was cleaned first. I've now got it down to just my bedroom and the kitchen that need a good cleaning. Unfortunately, I'm heading to Dhaka tomorrow before I'm able to get it done.

Having your own place is a bit of work but I kind of like it. I get to set my own schedule and it is all my responsibility so I don't have anyone else to blame if it doesn't get done. I like a sense of ownership.

This month is also Cricket World Cup! I'm understanding the game more and more with each day and I must say, I think it is way more interesting than baseball. Mainly because every ball is live as compared to baseball in which pitchers spend so much time feeling around the plate trying to tempt the batter to swing. In cricket the batter must defend the wicket from the ball every single time and the catcher will for sure cost his team runs if he misses the ball. The pitcher is also free to throw the ball at the batter whenever he likes. I still agree with Jodi though, the silly hats that the referees wear look stupid. :-)

Bangladesh in the Fall?

I've had an interesting experience a couple of times in the last week. I've walked out the front door of my house and just been struck by how much Bangladesh seems like fall back at home right now. I know this is a small window in time before it gets ridiculously hot but these experiences are wonderful. The first time it happened in the morning as I walked out into some cool crisp air. I could just close my eyes and see the combines running in the corn and bean fields in that moment. The funny thing is that the rice patty helps the illusion right now. The recently planted rice adds a smell and feel to the air that makes it feel so much more like home. The other time I experienced this feeling was this afternoon when I left my house at 5. It was the warmth of the sun which you knew would fade with it and the brownish faded green of the grass that did it this time. It reminded me of the slow death of foliage back at home. All this is to say, enjoy the simple pleasures in life everyone. They come and go; you only have them for a moment.