Back to Reality

So it seems that last week's optimistic post was just a cruel joke. Remember that shaken part, well some of it shook off on me and I got sick. In the middle of this, all the work I was doing in Dhaka followed me back home. Not all was bad, I did get to work at the Cow data but even that was missing enough that I can't see any clear results yet. I should get the rest of that today. Then I hop on the bus to Dhaka tomorrow morning because the work that followed me home is dragging me back to Dhaka. Not all is bad in this because I'll get to see Austin for the first time in several months. Basically though, there is a lot on my plate and I'm feeling it. I caught myself actually getting stressed out this morning. The defining characteristics of this side of my personality are extremely short patience and a bit of a contentious nature. My family knows this side of me very well where as I probably do a decent job of hiding it from most of the rest of the world. It is typically brought on by a situation (that is urgent in my mind) in which I feel like I should have some amount of control. If it is absolute chaos, no problem, but if I've got a little bit of a sense of control I turn into a nut job at times. I've recovered as I'm apt to do and intend to apologize to someone I had a work related phone conversation with. They didn't do anything to deserve my crappy attitude. Now I'm on to working with urgency to solve the problem without the attitude in tow!

In other news, I saw a Bengali man with the funkiest looking teeth ever this morning on my ride to work. Imagine the "billy bob" teeth that you can buy for costumes, only his over bite was off-center which made it even more pronounced. To his credit though, he still had all of his teeth.

I'll be sleeping at the office tonight. This is partly because I have a 5:15 a.m. bus in the morning and partly so I can make sure to listen to both the Atlanta Braves game (Brandon Beachy is pitching!) and the Colts game (I don't know any of them but I'm a complete addict). I just need to make sure that I behave emotionally and production-wise tomorrow despite my lack of sleep. I really probably shouldn't put this kind of stress on myself each week but it's only for 16 weeks and it really does give me a sense of connection to home. Connection to home certainly trumps 3 hours of sleep right?

Back to Balance and Joy

Oh the joys of being home! I get to sleep in my own bed and ride my bicycle. I also get to see my co-workers and hear about how someone in their family was sick at some point during the holidays. (Seriously, take 160 million people, shake violently aka. make them go home [where they will visit lots of friends and family] at the same time, add in 1 part of lots of rain to increase water born illness, and you get tons of sick people.) I also get to ride my bicycle by two dogs casually having "fun" on the road. This of course made me think of my brothers because all of us would have laughed at this random happenstance. It also brought back some good memories of the time when my brother and dad visited. Of course, I'm also back to having children scream at me as I ride my bicycle by and wondering if they'll ever realize that I can hear them just fine if they talk normally. Still, I like it much better here than in Dhaka. I have friends and am able to get exercise easily which are two things that really help me keep my life in balance. Now if I can just leverage that balance into getting additional work done...

Speaking of work, I've got a 2 inc thick stack of surveys sitting on my desk just waiting for me to parse through them and find out all the magical secrets that our dairy cow project holds. The several hours it will take to enter the data won't be all that fun but I am really looking forward to digging through the data afterward! I know that excitement may be somewhat strange on my part but if you think of the discoveries as an adventure to unravel the mysteries of the data, then you might start to understand. As an added bonus to the adventure, I get to help poor farmers! Yeah, my job is cool like that.

I'm proud to be an American?

Ramadan is officially over now which means I can eat or drink whatever I want on the streets again! However, given the history of street food making me sick, I think I'll stick with being selective in that regard.

I'm still in Dhaka working on various bits of paperwork but am hoping to get back to Bogra this weekend. I spent a little time this weekend talking to our director about this and found out that it is going to take more work than I had originally anticipated. :-(

I had a realization the other day. That whole Qur'an burning idea really could have put me in danger. I don't hide the fact that I'm American when I'm traveling around and I'm sure a lot of people know at least that much about me. That said, everyone I have met has been incredibly nice. Unfortunately, it isn't the people that I have met that I worry about, it is the people who I haven't met who hear through the grape vine that there is an American around that worry me. The people I have met generally see me as a person and appreciate that I'm something different than what they hear about Americans in the news. I can't be so certain that others recognize this and have been warned by very kind people that I meet in various places that these people do exist. For the most part though, this has never crossed my mind because to be frank, it is one of the few problems that most people in Bangladesh seem to want to root out. The government is pouring extra scrutiny on NGO's like MCC to try and make sure we aren't being devious. Now, I never heard from anyone in MCC that the whole Qur'an burning idea might endanger me but everyone was certainly very aware of the issue for quite obvious reasons. The thing that I just don't think American Christians really have a good concept of in general is how sacred or vile certain things are. There are very few things in American culture that you could do that would be so disrespectful that they would incite universal rage from everyone in the culture. In an Islamic culture, any kind of disrespectful treatment of the Qur'an would do this. The closest explanation I can come up with as to why this is this way is to point out that the Qur'an is the word of god and as such it is god. As my co-workers were pointing out, if Americans burn a bunch of English translations of the Qur'an it would be insulting but because these are not the exact words of god, it would remain at just the "I'm going to protest for my faith" level. If Americans burn a Islamic version of the Qur'an, suddenly I get the impression that we've crossed into the, "I'm defending god" level. All of that said, I could be wrong. These are just my personal understandings and are based off of a limited experience of two years in Bangladesh. I have certainly never heard anyone within MCC advocate these ideas (I only wish to say this so that I might be clear that my personal views should not be correlated to those of MCC). The point I'm really trying to make is that we should think and be aware of what our actions mean. Others interpret them in completely different lights because they have different experiences and you can't just ignore that in our modern, globalized world.

Oh the Journeys

I've talked about Ramadan quite a bit recently, but I don't recall if I mentioned what comes at the end of Ramadan. If I'm repeating myself, forgive me. At the end of Ramadan is Eid-ul-Fitre (pronounced more like Eed, ool, fit-ur). The two Eids are the some of the largest holidays in the Islamic calendar. Eid-ul-Fitre is when they celebrate and buy lots of new stuff. Eid-ul-Azha is when they sacrifice animals in the streets. Both are times when Bengali people take extended holidays to be with family. In the states, I've often heard the Memorial Day weekend is a big travel weekend in America, it has nothing on Bangladesh. Imagine somewhere around 10 million people trying to leave 1 city to return to various smaller towns throughout the country. Now imagine that combined with a transportation infrastructure that is already pretty bad. What you end up getting is gridlock in pretty much every town in Bangladesh but especially so within about 30 miles of the capital. At the same time, it also speaks volumes about families in Bangladesh. One could either argue that it is an amazing act of love for their family that people are willing to deal with all this trouble to see them or that it is an amazing act of power that their family exerts on them that the consequences of not joining their family is actually worse than the trouble the traffic causes. Either way, amongst the ex-pat crowd it is common sense that the "smart" people avoid the logjam.

I had planned to enjoy a nice peaceful stay out in the village for Eid but that plan changed today. I got a phone call asking me to meet with some people to get a report done. I mentioned that it should probably be finished before Eid. My boss agreed and told me to be in Dhaka tomorrow. Unfortunately as I realized later, that will essentially mean that I'm stuck there until after Eid because all the buses will be full leaving Dhaka in the lead up to Eid. After Eid, I should have no trouble getting back to Bogra though as all the buses will be full returning to Dhaka but not leaving it. So much for having a nice peaceful time in the village.

Speaking of peaceful times in the village, I went out to another village this morning. I'm trying to interview farmers and figure out what influences how much success they have. So far, I'm not sure how good my information is, but I'm getting a great tan.

In other news, I heard that we got the first of the approvals we've been seeking. That was exciting news since we had just been hearing promises of it's eventual occurrence up until now. Please keep praying that the others will come through so that we can get our service workers and other necessary approvals!

Joy and Sorrow

But first, something that has nothing to do with the title. In continuing on with my series about Ramadan I managed to take a picture of my Iftar meal last night. That big mass of stuff in the middle is a mixture of puffed rice, lentils, and a crushed up fried thing that is pretty spicy. Along the top you'll see (from left to right) dried dates which are quite sweet, some fried thing which was somewhat akin to a fried bread, and last but not least, the jelapi which is basically some sort of deep fried sugar (incredibly tasty in my opinion). You eat this with your fingers and I was given a glass of lemonade with it. I get the idea that it is common for anyone with any kind of money to have some sort of fruit drink with the meal (the previous two nights it was mango juice). After you finish eating all of this, they bring out biriani, which is basically the greasiest rice you'll ever find with meat chunks in it. It is hands down the heaviest thing I've ever had in my life as far as how fast it fills you up. Basically, other than the lentils, dates, and puffed rice, the entire meal is nothing but grease. It is very heavy and I'm not sure how everyone's bodies can handle the shock of eating this to end a fast but somehow they manage


The joy in life lately was found upon arriving home last night. Roommate Nate was sitting outside with his guitar, singing to a group of neighbors. He's done this for the past couple of nights and they seem to love it. His broken hand is healing nicely and the return of guitar playing is a beautiful result of this. I stood out and listened to his song and then told him that if he picks a song from his book that I know, I'll sing along with him. I know I've mentioned this off hand a couple of times, but the singing is one thing I love about this culture. They could care less if you are really any good or not, just the fact that someone is willing to sing seems to always bring a smile to their faces. The other thing Nate and I agreed upon is that the best part of singing for the village is that they know incredibly little English so you can sing nonsensical things and they'll still think it was part of the song. I say all this to point out that those who know me best know that I love to sing but am quite confident that I'm not all that good at it. Suddenly, I have the option to sing in front of people and feel no pressure to perform well at all. This makes me very excited. I think I'll join Nate in the future, I can sing the melodies and he can harmonize to his hearts desire (something he is very good at). :-)

Unfortunately, with joy comes sorrow. One of our guards (a wonderful man) was telling us last night about his sick wife. From what I can gather, she had a large lump next to her eye. He called it a tumor but said the doctor pulled some sort of liquid out of it. He had to take her to Dhaka to find a doctor who could properly diagnose it and just that makes me very nervous about how bad of a situation she is in. He said they'll have an actual diagnosis of it by tonight but it is sounding like she'll need surgery which will cost about 30,000 taka which is roughly 4 months of wages for him. Basically, everything about the situation sounds horrible to me and I'm not sure I can do much to help. Please be keeping him in your prayers!

Ramadan

A little explanation of my understanding of the purpose of Ramadan. It is intended to be a month of time in which Muslims focus extra effort into following the teachings of Islam. As a result, it is my understanding that people are more likely to be honest during this time because of the strong push for purity. It is also a time of greater generosity for Muslims because it is also meant to be a practice that teaches empathy for the less fortunate. Not everyone is required to hold the fast. A few exemptions are young children, the disabled, the chronically ill, the elderly, and women who are pregnant or nursing who think the fast will be harmful to them or their child. For some of these people, such as the elderly or the chronically ill, they are expected to feed others as a penance for their inability to fast. For others, such as the women, they are expected to make up the days at a later time. Even for those who are not typically very devout Muslims in Bangladesh, there is pressure to observe the fast as it is a very public thing. Those who refuse to keep the fast do lose respect in the eyes of their fellow Muslims.

As far as what the result of this is on my life, it does cause some issues. Being that I am not a Muslim, I am obviously not keeping the fast. I previously mentioned that I have to watch what I eat in public though as it is considered rude to eat in front of those who are fasting. I also learned this past week that at sundown when the daily fast ends, everything stops and people eat their Iftar meal. This becomes something that you have to plan your evening around. In our situation, we were hoping to stop by the A&W Rootbeer restaurant for dinner only to find out that they were not serving regular food until after the Iftar meal was over. So we went to look at shops until such a time as we could get this food. Unfortunately, they kicked us out of the shops so they could eat their Iftar meal which meant that we were stuck on that side of town with nothing to do while Iftar was being eaten. We did eventually find a coffee shop that was operating through the Iftar time and sat down for a chat while we waited for things to open up again. We eventually did get our nice frost mug of rootbeer but the process did open our eyes a bit to how much the month of Ramadan does change how society operates here.

Grace

I'm a little bit late with this post, I hope you can forgive me. This past week was the start of Ramadan. For those who don't know, Ramadan is essentially the Islamic holy month of fasting. Everyone gets up at 4am, stuffs themselves full, and then don't eat or drink again until sundown (currently 6:30 or so). Some people don't keep the fast for various reasons but it is still considered very rude of them to eat or drink anything in front of others who are keeping the fast. During the day all of the street food vendors have curtains hanging up over the entrance to their shops so that people can come and eat without being seen. Other changes occur as well, our office hours are different during Ramadan. We are currently working on an 8:30-3:30 office schedule which is much shorter than the usual 8-5 schedule. This is both so that our workers are productive (you get very unproductive in the heat of the afternoon/evening when you are fasting) and so that they make it home in time for the breaking of the fast. I think I'll wait to share more in my next post.

A couple of mildly interesting things happened in my life in the most recent week. I passed my motorcycle test and will finally be driving motorcycle legally in Bangladesh once I get the actual license. They say that I should get it next month sometime. That will mean that I finally get it 11 months after I initially asked about getting it. I think that's a good indication of how fast paperwork moves around here. Speaking of motorcycles, driving motorcycle after dark is probably the scariest thing I have ever done in my life. In the dark the buses can no longer tell that I'm an expat and they treat me just like any other motorcycle, which means I get run off the road or at least onto the shoulder of the road frequently. This past week I drove my motorcycle home for some reason (not sure why, I normally choose to ride bicycle) and I saw a bus passing a truck coming at me. I didn't think much of this and just moved to the shoulder of the road like usual. The part I couldn't figure out though is that I saw another headlight coming at me on the shoulder of the road. I just couldn't fathom why a motorcycle would be trying to pass a bus that was passing a truck. Then once I got closer I realized that it wasn't a motorcycle but another bus trying to pass the other two vehicles. Luckily for me, he saw me with enough time to swerve back over behind the other bus before we reached each other but I was afraid for a second that I was going to have to into the ditch to avoid him. That would not be pleasant.

I also bought a phone. This was a very troubling decision for me. I try to live a somewhat simple lifestyle and like to limit the amount of money I spend on "toys" or frivolous things I don't actually need. I'm getting ready to do some research in a field area and it won't be with our regular farmers. It will be with whoever is available and I will need to return to these same people frequently for follow up surveys. The problem this creates is how to keep track of them and find them when I don't know the area well. The solution that came to my mind was GPS. Nathan and Daniel have this on their phones already and I've seen how convenient it is at mapping out roads as well as marking important points. I decided that this could provide extremely useful for this work but didn't want to throw a whole lot of money at the problem. I eventually decided that I could probably buy a simple GPS phone myself with the idea that I could continue using it after my MCC term is done. The only problem with this plan was that GPS phones are a little pricier than I would normally want to spend on a phone and come with other little gadgets and do-dads. I eventually found the one I would buy if I were going to buy one. It is nothing real fancy as far as phones go but it is a nice phone but I was still left deciding whether spending that much money on a phone fit with my values of simplicity. This lead to a good conversation with Nathan who brought up a couple of very good points. He pointed out to me that technology in general will usually not fit with the traditional concept of simplicity and if you start pushing the simplicity aspect really hard you start becoming legalistic with it (some might argue that the Amish are an example of this). I think his point was that we have to carefully give ourselves some grace when incorporating technology into a simple lifestyle because it will always be at odds with a "pure" simple life but is also capable of doing many wonderful things. So when the microphone on my old phone died yesterday, I didn't feel any anxiety over the decision to just go buy my new GPS phone.